Living out of Water: Patrick's Date One-Shots
by TheUltimateCombo
Summary: Set in the world of my other fic: Living out of Water: Squidward's Story. Patrick thinks that his life is behind the curve, when he bumps into a redhead who needs a spirit boost. So he buys her coffee. Meanwhile, Spongebob and Squidward collect their jaws. One-Shot. Update: Now a series of one-shots.
1. Chapter 1

Rina was rushing back home. Tears streamed down her face. Her emerald eyes turned ever more-watery by the second. Her red-colored lips quivered. Her stomach jumped, her breath quickened along with her pace. Long red locks clouded her vision. Suddenly, she felt herself smacking into something rather large.

"Oof!"

Or rather, someone.

Patrick and Spongebob were across the street from Krusty Kompany. Squidward was in an important company meeting, and asked the two to accompany him. They couldn't follow him in, so they stayed outside, Spongebob on a city bench, and Patrick just standing.

"You know, I was thinking about getting back out there," Patrick said.

"Huh?"

"I haven't been on a date since Mindy left Bikini Bottom."

"But you never dated Mindy. Or anyone for that matter…" Spongebob replied.

"True. It's just that, you have Sandy, Squidward has Lax, and both of you have kids. I just feel like my life is behind the curve."

"Hmm…" Spongebob returned to the newspaper he was reading.

"If only she could only bump into me right-oof!"

Patrick turned around to face a human girl with red hair and emerald eyes.

"Oh, hi!"

"I'm really sorry, I'm just trying to get home." The girl quivered, dropping a few text books. Patrick stooped to pick them up for her.

"Here ya go!" Patrick smiled.

"Thanks." The girl started to look up at him.

"I'm Patrick!"

"Rina," she timidly replied.

"So, why the rush? Late for class?"

"Actually, going home from class."

"What college do you go to?" Spongebob's gaze started to drift from his paper.

"UoW. I'm majoring in Teaching."

"Cool! What's college like? I've never been."

"It's…different for everyone," Rina wiped away a few tears from her eyes.

"Hey, are you okay?" Patrick asked, noticing the tears.

"I'll be fine. Just a rough day in class."

Patrick and Rina shuffled in front of each other.

"I should be getting home; my roommate will be wondering where I am."

"Before you go, I was hoping I could buy you a cup of coffee? To cheer you up!" Patrick offered.

Spongebob dropped his paper.

"That sounds nice. I'd love to get coffee. Buffalo Café is up the street," Rina replied.

"Cool, after you!"

Patrick and Rina left in the direction of the café. Still on the bench, Spongebob wondered aloud.

"What just happened?"

* * *

"Thanks!"

Patrick grabbed two cappuccinos and walked over to the table he and Rina had picked. He slid Rina her coffee, and started to sip on his. Rina looked to the side for a second, before starting to drink her coffee.

"Thank you for this," she said. "I needed it."

"No problem. This is the first time a girl's agreed to get coffee with me," Patrick said. "Not that I've asked many. Or any…"

Rina blushed. "This is my first date too."

"How come?"

"I don't know. People look at me, but they never approach. People say I'm kind of a ditz."

"People used to say the same about me. I mean, I get why, but you seem quite level headed."

"And then I bumped into you," Rina blushed.

"It was a pleasurable bump," Patrick flirted, and Rina laughed.

"I'm glad," Rina leaned into her chair and sipped her coffee again.

 _Don't mess up, Pat! You got this!_

"You're very pretty!" Patrick complimented. Rina's eyes widened. Patrick started to sweat.

"Uh, I mean, your eyes. They have this nice, um, emerald color. And your hair. It's a beautiful dark orange color. I also like your freckles. Um, I just noticed you had freckles… Am I talking too much? I think I'm talking too much. I just…"

"Patrick, you're fine. Thank you." Rina smiled. Patrick sighed in relief.

"And I think you're kinda cute," Rina added. Patrick looked confused.

"I, uh… thanks." Patrick struggled to regain his thoughts. Eventually, he asked, "What are your hobbies?"

* * *

Squidward came out of Krusty Kompany, approaching Spongebob, while scanning for Patrick.

"Where's Pinky?"

"On a date," Spongebob coyly replied.

"Hah, now seriously, where'd he go?"

"On a date."

Squidward arched an eyebrow.

"Um, was this a prearranged engagement?"

"Nope, a girl bumped into him and they left to get coffee," Spongebob smirked.

"You're fishing with me…"

"Nope. They've been gone for about half an hour."

"The only thing Patrick would date is a hot dog cart. Or a hot dog cart vendor. She must be the ugliest…" Squidward trailed off as Patrick approached with his "date". Rina shouldered Patrick's arm, and clung to the Starfish. Spongebob got up to greet them.

"Hi, I'm Spongebob, and you are?"

"Blind," Squidward muttered.

"Rina. Nice to meet you."

"That's my best friend, and the other guy is Squidward!"

"Hi Squidward!"

Squidward silently waved.

"So, I'm going to walk Rina home. I'll meet you guys in a bit." Patrick said. He and Rina started walking off in the direction of her place.

"Walk her home? Who does he think he's kidding?"

"Oh, come on, Squidy. It's Patrick. He's too innocent!" Spongebob smiled. Squidward stared flatly back.

"Come on, I'll drive." Spongebob walked over to the Honda Civic parked at the curb, Squidward reluctantly following.

* * *

Patrick and Rina stopped outside the black gate of a two-floor house. Painted red on the outside, the house had a sharp, pointed black roof, and white paint on the windowsills. It looked quaint, yet lonely.

"This is where you live?" Patrick asked, concerned.

"Yeah. My roommate's inside. You should meet her!"

"Nah, that's okay. I've got to go too. But hey, coffee was fun."

"Are you sure you don't want to meet her? She's great, I promise!"

"Maybe next time," Patrick smiled.

"Next time?"

"Unless, you don't want a next time. One time's fine. Great even!"

"It's just, how will we keep in touch?"

"The Pat signal!" Patrick shouted, posing triumphantly. Rina giggled uncontrollably.

"Or in cases of daytime emergency, you call my cell phone. My number's 206-XXX-XXXX. Call me anytime."

"Will do," Rina smiled. "Good day, Patrick Star!"

"Same to you, Madame Rilde!" Patrick saluted as he walked away. As he rounded the corner, he heard,

"Boo!" It was Spongebob and Squidward.

"Hey guys! What're you doing here?"

"We figured not to let you walk thirty-two blocks home," Spongebob said.

"How 'bout a ride, Romeo?" Squidward teased.

"Very well, kind sirs, I shall accompany in this chariot."

"So, how'd it go? I mean the date and everything?" Spongebob asked.

"It was awesome! I hope I see her again. I really think I've found the one." Patrick said.

"Wait and see how it develops, Patrick. Might just be coffee." Squidward said.

"Not likely."

* * *

Rina entered her house. From the kitchen came her roommate's voice.

"Is that you, Ri?"

"Yeah," Rina kicked off her shoes as her roommate came out to meet her.

"How was your day?" she asked.

"It started off kinda bad, then I met this guy, Vickie."

"Oh?" Victoria raised a brow as she stirred cake mix.

"His name is Patrick. We had coffee. He seems like a nice guy."

"He didn't try to harm you, did he?" Victoria asked.

"No. We just got coffee. And he gave me his number."

"Are you going to call him?"

"Should I?"

Victoria looked at her roommate and best friend. She wanted to protect Rina, and hadn't met this Patrick guy yet, but something about Rina's demeaner told Vi that Rina would be okay. Rina had horrible luck when it came to people. Aside from a small group of close friends, she didn't have many people she could depend on. Fortunately, Victoria was one of those friends. Rina looked genuinely happy.

"Why not? Give him a ring. I'd like to meet him." Victoria started walking back towards the kitchen.

"Cool! I think he might be someone special, Vickie."

"Wait it out Ri. Just go it slow and see how things pan out. After all, it's just coffee."

Rina got out her phone and sent Patrick a test text. When it went through and he replied, she smiled.

"Not likely."

 **A/N: This one shot is set after chapter 13 of my fic Living out of Water: Squidward's Story. Kind of a one shot, but if you want to see more, leave a review. Hope you enjoyed, and I'll catch you all later.**


	2. Chapter 2

"I'll have the chicken fried chicken," Patrick ordered.

"What three sides?"

"Dumplings, mac and cheese, and, perhaps the grits. Plain."

"And for you miss?" The waitress turned to Rina.

"Same," she replied, brushing a hair away.

"Sides?"

"Same."

"It'll be right out." The waitress waddled back inside the kitchen, nose upturned.

"Well, thanks for joining us, guys," Alaxis said to Patrick and Rina. Lax and Squidward were enjoying their second wedding anniversary at a Cracker Barrel in Puyallup. The rustic, candle-lit atmosphere, and the warmth of the nearby fireplace set the mood for the evening. Of course, it wasn't a perfect double date. A one-year old Laxi Tentacles was part of her parents' celebration, sitting in a highchair, sipping her apple juice quite contentedly.

Patrick and Rina were a new couple, having dated only a few months prior to the occasion, but the Tentacles invited them for the support and advice they could give.

"So, how's things?" Alaxis asked enthusiastically.

"Good, actually. We've gotten a few stares, but no major harassment," Patrick proudly replied, rubbing Rina's shoulders. Rina bent her head, fiddling with her phone.

"I think you two paved the way, honestly. Without your guys' example, I don't think Rina and I would've had a shot."

A tear hit Rina's phone. Lax turned to her.

"Rina? Are you okay."

"I need to use the bathroom. Excuse me," Rina got up hurriedly, keeping her face from sight. Patrick gently grabbed her arm, but Rina shrugged it off.

"She's been a little on edge recently," Patrick smiled unconvincingly.

Squidward gave him a flat look, then turned to Alaxis.

"I'll make sure she's okay, babe," Lax and Squidward shared a kiss, before she went to the bathroom.

"On edge?" Squidward asked after a long pause.

"She looks at me and just stares sometimes. And when I acknowledge her, she seems to snap back into reality, and doesn't realize that she was staring."

"I see…"

"Then we'll be at a restaurant, and she'll always order the same food. Last time, I ordered Jalapeno poppers. She had to go to the hospital. She's allergic to peppers," Patrick looked at Squidward with a wetness in his eyes.

"I love her, Squid, I do. But I don't think I make her happy."

"So, what are you going to do?" Squidward asked, wiping some juice from Laxi's mouth.

"Should I break up with her?"

Squidward stared to his left, tilting his head to think. Turning back to Patrick.

"Just talk to her. Make sure she's okay with your relationship. If she says she doesn't want to date anymore, break it off. Don't just drop her. I don't think she can take it."

"What makes you say that?"

Squidward stared towards the bathrooms.

"Ever since you two walked in here, she's been looking depressed. I don't think she's looked at you once. Or us. Or the waitress. Or anyone for that matter."

Patrick rubbed his chin in thought. Rina had been quiet on the drive over, too. He tried playing her favorite song, but it failed to get even a smile out of the girl. He tried singing it for her, but she just turned her head.

"I'm a failure, Squidward."

"What makes you say that?"

"I guess she doesn't want to be around me anymore."

* * *

Rina sat inside a stall, texting her friend, Victoria.

" _It's getting worse, Vickie._ "

After a few seconds, Victoria replied.

" _Get off of your phone, now. It's the only way._ "

" _But I stopped posting the pictures, Vi. I thought it would stop there."_

" _Ri, take it from me: complete separation is required. Now go and enjoy dinner. He's probably worried sick."_

Rina stared at her phone in debate. The bathroom door opened.

"Rina? Are you in here?"

Rina exited the stall, meeting Alaxis.

"There you are. Are you okay?"

"I'm fine," Rina replied, bending over the sink.

"What's wrong?"

Alaxis moved to sit on the sink. Rina looked at Lax, sighing.

"Patrick and I've been dating for a few months now, and well, he's a great guy, like me in some respects, but I wonder if I'm right for him."

"Why?" Alaxis looked at Rina confused. "You seem nice enough."

"Well, thank you. I just…I had been posting some pictures of us online. At first no one seemed to care. But then, I started getting all these replies about sleeping with the fishes, and how I'm such a slut. One person said that I was so unwanted, I settled for anything," Rina stared into the drain of the sink.

"Well, you know how people on the internet are," Alaxis said, attempting to laugh off the pressure. When she started to chuckle, Rina snapped her head towards Lax. Alaxis gulped. The redhead's eyebrows were turned down, and her emerald green eyes turned even darker.

"These weren't just random people. These were people whom I considered friends!"

"I'm sorry,"

"I'm not some internet celebrity, you know. I post for people who I value in my life. My family. My friends. My own sister said I was a disgrace."

"I understand. That sucks." Lax said. Rina turned away and breathed slowly.

"I'm sorry. I just don't have a lot of people I call friends. My friend Victoria is the only one who's stood by me. Well, her and my parents."

"What about Patrick?"

"I know he suspects something. I just don't know if he's ready for this side of our relationship."

Rina's phone buzzed. Lax looked at her. Rina nodded at Lax before picking it up. It was a text from her cousin Roan.

" _Hey, Ri. Just got back home from duty. I hope you're hanging in there. If you'd like, we can get some breakfast tomorrow at Denny's. Bring Patrick and Vickie. It'll be great to catch up. Love you, Cousin."_

"Think our food's out by now?" Alaxis asked.

"Yeah," Rina smiled.

* * *

On the drive home, Patrick looked at Rina funnily.

"Feeling better?" he asked.

"What do you mean?" Rina stared confused.

"After you came back you started being yourself. You must've playing peek-a-boo with Laxi for a half hour," Patrick grinned. Rina turned her head and smiled.

"Oh, and when you two played tic-tac-toe," Patrick laughed.

"It's her squid genes. She's smarter than the average one-year-old," Rina defended.

"Sure," Patrick smiled. "I like you this way."

"What way?"

"Happy. Engaging. Not down and depressed."

Rina looked away.

"Look, Ri. I'm sorry if I made you upset over anything. I can be a bit stupid sometimes."

"Patrick, you're a great guy. I like you. I've just been dealing some stuff."

"Related?"

"Kind of. I had posted some pictures of us online. Didn't get a lot of positive feedback," Rina said.

"That's to be expected, right?" Patrick asked, raising an eyebrow.

"It was from some close friends, though."

"Then, I'm sorry Ri, but they shouldn't be your friends. I mean, it's not like I'm an animal. I'm like, an alien at best."

"A pink, starfish-looking, earthborn alien," Rina smirked.

"Touché, yet an alien nonetheless," Patrick replied, his face not breaking its composure once.

Their drive continued quietly. Eventually, Rina said,

"So, my cousin Roan's in town."

"The air force pilot?" Patrick paled.

"Yeah. He says he wants to meet you."

"Where?"

"Denny's. Tomorrow. So, around 8 am if that's okay."

Patrick pulled into Rina's driveway.

"Okay. Sure. I'll pick you up at 7:30."

"Great! Good night, Pat."

"'Night Ri."

The two briefly pecked before Rina got out of the car. After she stepped inside, Patrick pulled away, dreading tomorrow.

* * *

"So, you worked your magic?" Squidward asked his wife.

"It was the usual problem," Lax replied.

"How's Patrick?" Lax asked.

"Happy that she's happy."

"Laxi seems to like her," Alaxis looked behind at their daughter, clapping away in her car seat.

"Yeah. That's a good thing. At least we have another babysitter."

"Squidward, how old do you think she is?"

"23. Patrick told me. Perfect age to get those motherly instincts working. And trust me, she's got them."

Alaxis folded her arms, and raised a piqued brow at her husband.

"Either way, how'd you enjoy dinner? My steak was a bit tough."

"Well that _is_ well done, but I liked my chicken. I enjoyed the company more," Lax said.

"Same," Squidward smiled. "So, dessert?"

"Sure, I could go for some ice cream," Alaxis reasoned.

"Yeah, I'm in the mood for some mint and vanilla." Squidward quirked his brow.

"Oh really? That does sound like an enjoyable combination," Alaxis smirked.

"Quite."

Squidward made a quick turn onto their street.


End file.
